Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Flying off to Vietnam le..... Sianz! Just woke up at around 8.45 and had my breakfast already, it will be the last breakfast in Singapore after which I'll be flying to Vietnam for 3 weeks. Will miss the chupz at orchard the most! Haha...

Anyway I've packed all my stuff already, think 3 weeks later I'll be shorter cuz the bloody backpack that I'm bringing there is damn heavy! Hope that I brought every single little thing that is needed!

Gotta go prepare le, go bathe and da ban mei mei!(Sounds abit Bapuk huh!)Haha... Cuz my dad will be coming back to send me to the airport, what a fabulous dad I have!!! Who needs a girlfriend when you have such a wonderful family? Haha, sounds alittle sacarstic huh.... ;)

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Samuel || 12:14 PM

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

Packing Stuffs for Viet Viet Just finished eating my yummilicious dinner. Then my mum was funny as she say, "eat more ar, drink more soup also ar, cuz the next 3 weeks I won't be able to taste anything she cook." Haha...

Anyway went to school this morning to go through what's needed to be brought to Vietnam, and discussed about stuffs like equipments needed for construction, cooking, personal and etc. Also discussed about what to bring and what not to bring, where to meet tml at the airport and what time to meet. Have to wake up very early tml cuz gotta meeting Darren and Parrot they all at Jurong East at 8.45am! By the way, today's CheeHeng's birthday so the ever caring YongHsing bought a cake for him and Summer(whose bday was last friday) and we celebrated for them.

Actually I've already finished packing the stuff needed to bring to Vietnam yesterday night but guess tonight will have to go through again to make sure I bring everything needed. Sianz! Forgot to bring the Shampoo and body foam today to school to distribute to YongHsing and Darren, guess I've to carry them myself tml le, very heavy!!!!!

Gotta go pack my stuff and go through it again now. And I think I won't be blogging so often for the next 3 weeks unless I happen to visit any lan gaming shops over there to check my mail and stuffs. Bye guys, take care!!! Hehe... Ciao! ;)

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Samuel || 10:48 AM

Monday, May 24, 2004

Fixing Curtain... Very tired today, dunno why also. Went to Balestier just now with my parents and me younger bro to go there pray pray...

Then after that was very hungry cuz I didn't have anything for breakfast, so we went over to PS for our lunch as my dad wants to buy curtain for my living room. After that nothing to walk already so came home early at around 4 plus.

Helped my dad to fix the curtain the moment we reached home, after that unpack the stuff that I bought and had our dinner. Now chatting online with Tay and Fiona, and at the same time dying my hair, hope the colour will appear fine, haha.... Will be flying off in 2 days time to Viet, hope that I have already bought all my stuff if not must last minute, very sianz!

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Samuel || 10:35 AM

Sunday, May 23, 2004

Went SOS and drink, watch soccer... Just reached home not long ago, was out at town since 4 plus with Tay, Darren, YongHsing and ShaoHua. Anyway I went for a haircut today, shave all my sides and leave a ponytail behind, haha... SHAVE OFF ALL MY TROUBLES!!!! Then went over to Tampines at around 2pm, went to my er-ge's house to get the backpack from him, then came home again before going to town... Its abit far loh, TAMPINES!!! But luckily got my best DAD to send me there and fetch me home, haha....

After that went to town and meet those guys at around 5, went for billiard before having our Long John dinner at Cine. And we saw quite alot of chupz over there, there's one particular chup wearing red pull-over, she's damn pretty and she's with her group of friends who notice us seeing them, shy like dogzzzz!!!

Then we saw Hweeling also over there at PastaMania with her group of friends but guess she didnt notice us except Tay! We were all rotting after our dinner cuz its just about 8 and we dunno where to go, so went over to the pub Barcelona over at MS there where JunXiong is working.

But its abit sianz over there so at about 10 went over to SOS to watch the FA Cup Finals between Man United and Millswall. Played afew games of pool there with ppl challenging, luckily I win, haha... If not Pai Sae! The club very deserted loh, only afew chupz at first then they left after the match, haiz, sad like dog! Then there's this girl in red again wear bare-back wor... haha!!!! Like all the chupz today wear red, so if you're reading my blog and you wore red today so consider yourself as a chupz ba! Anyway we had nothing to do so we drink and drink and drink, Brandy Coke, Vodka Lime, Tequila neat, Tequila Pop, etc..

I left earlier then them and when I'm leaving that place heard someone calling my name, its Meiling and one more girl from Fajar, I dunno who the hell they are but they say" Samuel! You fajar wan right?" Then I replied " Ya... but I gotta go le." Too bad la, if not can ask them go supper, haha.... I think I'm drunk, I'm very tired le, go sleep first... Ciao!!! ;)

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Samuel || 6:02 PM

Saturday, May 22, 2004

How's Jeraldine?? Did nothing much today. As usual went to school class T3A14 at 9am, sat down and rot away. Didn't even bother to comb my hair today cuz maybe I'm shag and kinda sick of my hair, feel like shaving the sides off and leave a ponytail behind like Bapuk Tay's, haha...

Anyway, we finished very early today cuz we just practically talk about cultural differences, the activities differences of Viet and Singapore and lastly just go through the list of equipments, personal belongings that are needed to bring to Viet. Tml still have to go down to Tampines to take the backpack from my Er-ge cuz the backpack from William too small le, have to bring alot of stuff there.
Kinda afraid that the backpack will be too heavy for me to carry, haha... I bapuk leh..

Then today after sch, was about 2 plus only, so decided to go over to IMM and see whether we still need to buy any stuff not. Bought afew shampoos, Shower foam, toothpaste, etc. Then after that went over to Celestal's house first, which is the same block as Jeraldine's. I lead the way loh, cuz I know ma, last time alwasy walk with Jeraldine wan, haha.... Anyway wondering how's Jeraldine doing, kinda lost contact with her le, kinda miss Bruno also... ;)

Haiz, tml Igni not booking out, no car to sit le, must use EZ link, very ex leh... haha... Now listening to Xian Wei Jing Xia De Ai Qing by Huang Yida, a very nice song, exactly what I feel like saying out after the break up with Dawn. Actually found quite alot of songs that describes my feeling after breaking up with her, find those songs quite nice, quite suitable for break-ups. Haha....

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Samuel || 12:14 PM

Friday, May 21, 2004

Plant Nursery at Pasir Panjang!!!!!! So early!!!!! Wa... I'm very very tired today. Woke up at about 6.15am loh, then my dad send me to CCK interchange to meet up with Parrot, Summer, Ruibin and YongHsing. That Ah pek YongHsing late for about half an hour loh, we were supposed to meet at the 188 bus there at 7.15am but he reached only at about 7.45am. Haiz, more or less knew someone will be late today cuz last night we had a conference talk till about 2.

Anyway we were supposed to be at the plant nursery at Pasir Panjang around 8.30 but we reached at 9.00am. Was quite sorry to the other half of the Vietnam Team peeps cuz we made them wait so long. Actually we did nothing much at the nursery also, just learnt afew methods of planting tress which I already forgotten. Had our breakfast only at about 11 plus close to 12 when we were about to leave that place cuz we really had no time for the beehoon bought by Darren, we were already running super late.

Next, went to the next street only to the dunno what museum which is a historical war memorial place. Stayed there and understand about the second world war which took place at that place till about 3pm. Then we also walked through the canopy walk over there which I find it quite romantic except that its scary cuz its quite high up and there's mosquitoes and hornets there.

Was already very shag by the time our activity ends loh, but we still have to go to beach rd to see whatever things we need for the trip. We each bought a sleeping mat, a sleeping air pillow. Then Darren, YongHsing, Parrot and I bought the same shorts for the trip loh, 3 shorts somemore, completely the same, haha.... Then after that headed straight home le, my dinner was fried kuey tiao somemore, die le, surely fat!!!!

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Samuel || 12:35 PM

Thursday, May 20, 2004

Car Wash Day!!!! So fun.... Did nothing much today, was late for school, reach only at about 9.20am. Then we went over to the Concrete lab @ workshop 5, taught the other DBPM and Archi students on how do we mix concrete. After that, went for our half an hour long tea break whereby I had a cheese and ham sandwich and a packet of vitasoy.

At about 11, went over to wash car again loh.. This time is Dr. Lu's toyota corolla, haha... He gave us only 20 bucks loh but thats already quite alot for washing car la. We played around with water again untill all of us became LUO TANG CHICKEN loh. Was feeling quite cold after the washing of car when we were back to class, and we were quite afraid that we may catch a cold.

Then went for lunch at about 12 plus, die la, had PORK CHOP again loh!!! FAT LE LA!!! Cannot, must start to train le, must carry weights and go jogging. Anyway after lunch we practically did nothing, just rot in class and did the Social Tree thingie whereby we have to understand both Singapore and Vietnam's economy, history, government and social.

Then lastly went for a few rounds of billiard with Darren, Larry, YongHsing and LayLay. All of us were quite shag already cuz we all off-form loh, except for MR DARREN TAN! Think he quite enjoyed the billiard session, haha... Gotta go rest le, very tired, tmr still gotta wake up super early cuz we have to reach Pasir Panjang at 8.30am LOH!!! But I feel like playing my PS2 first leh, hahahha.... ;)

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Samuel || 12:22 PM

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Die la, Fat already!!!! I kinda shag today loh... Was washing cars the whole day from 10 till around 4 to earn some money as fund-raising for the Vietnam Trip. We started off with Ian Ong's car then we were like washing it for about 3 times before applying wax on it to make it shine.

But after the first wash the rain came loh, abit spoiler loh but nvm cuz Junquan, Darren, ruibin, YongHsing and me were playing in the rain like little children, haha... Cuz we were sitting in the shelter at workshop 4 then the car is parked like just about 7 feets away from us. So we decided to play a game whereby the pails of water are all put beside the car and we have to throw a towel into any of the pails, if we manage to get the towel in then the next person will have to get it for himself, if not the thrower will get it for the next person. Abit stupid right? But we kinda enjoy it leh, maybe because we are all too bored le ba, waiting for the stupid rain to stop.

After the rain stopped, we continued washing the car for the second time and then headed for our lunch and at the same time letting the car dry. I had PORK CHOP ADD EGG loh, die le la, fat like dog liao... After lunch wash car again, haiz... Next time no work can venture into the car washing business.

Then after the third wash, we began waxing and with our hands loh... cuz no more cloth le ma, then use hands, don't even know whether will I do that in the future for my own car not? Haha... Halfway through waxing, we were damn sianz I think so Summer, Darren, YongHsing, Cheeheng, Ruibin and I began to sing, haha... Like in KTV like that, funny like dog! Sang romantic songs(made me think od Dawn only), camp songs, chinese song, english song, cantonese songs, and ya, we started to speak in cantonese also then YongHsing damn Dulan cuz he don't understand or don't speak a single word of it, haha...

Felt quite satisfied cuz by the time we finish waxing the car, it was quite shiny as i can see my whole facial reflection on the car. Then Ian Ong gave us 90 bucks instead of the 50 bucks he promised before, wa... he good like dogz!! Haha...

Stayed in school somemore after that loh, cuz had to decide on which tee-shirt material and colour we are intending to buy. So in the end left school only at about 7 and reach home at 8. Now writing this blog loh, hope all the things I wrote can help me remember what I did cuz had to write log book, sianz!!!

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Samuel || 12:57 PM

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Overnight baking cookies!!! Didn't write my blog last night cuz I was over at Ruibin's house with Cheeheng, Darren, Parrot, Celestal, Summer, Shujun and Yong Hsing. We stayed overnight there as we have to bake enough cookies to sell & raise funds.

We reached Ruibin's house at around 2 yesterday and started baking all the way till 2 at night. Was quite tired as we stand throughout the day and spent the whole day in the kitchen beating eggs, cutting butters and all that.

At last we slept at around 3 all the way till 10 this morning eventhough we were supposed to be at school @ 9. Set off for school and reached around 12.30pm, and we started going around the campus selling off the cookies. One bag cost 5 bucks and we calculated just now that we made a profit of about 600 dollars from an estimated 130 bags of cookies.

Just reached home not long ago and had my bath already, feeling very tired and shag now loh.....But very very hungry cuz I just had a small bowl of beehoon the whole day. Ciao first, go have my dinner le.... ;)

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Samuel || 9:58 AM

Sunday, May 16, 2004

Troy... Just reached home and had my bath. Went Orchard just now with Darren, Igni and Bapuk Tay loh, 4 big guys, abit sianz right? Anyway we went for billiard at town and we bought tickets for Troy at Lido at 8.45pm. It lasted for 2hrs and 45 mins, damn long, sit till my butt pain loh. Was walking around Borders and Lido before the show starts cuz we had about an hour to spare and we were all like "Chupz, Chupz!" Haha...

The show was damn nice, Brad pitt was damn damn damn handsome and damn damn damn hunk manz! Die la, think I'm turning back into a Bapuk again loh. Maybe lack of Dawn's love? Haha, just kidding.. But the show was great, its definitely worth the 8.50 bucks.

Actually the show should be rated NC-16 cuz Brad pitt and afew ladies were nude for afew scenes but they were properly covered, maybe just saw their butts or whatever or maybe because we were sitting in the first few rows so we were like exposed very near to their butts. Haha...

Then throughout our whole day at town, we 4 guys were like saying these few words all the time " Hanna Hannaz, Diam la, Kao Pei la, WHAT?" Even in the cinema we were like that cuz the 2 girls sitting beside Igni was damn fucking irritating! Like never see show before, was so damn auntie loh... All the way, "Wa, so handsome", "Wa, so cool", "Wa, so cute". Aiyoh, hear already also buai tahan...

Tml we'll be going to Ruibin's house to stay overnight cuz we gotta bake cookies. Gotta do something for the Viet fund-raising thingie, so decided to bake cookies. Abit tired loh... ;)

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Samuel || 3:45 PM

Pulau Ubin plus Shag Day!!! Reach home at about 1 plus last night, was already so damn tired to log into my blogger and type it all out although I seems to have alot to say.

Yesterday, the whole Viet team went to Pulau Ubin. Find it quite stupid as the things we did over there can be done anywhere. We did nothing much except for trekking around and did some revisions on medic. I was like a walking zombie over there at Ubin cause the previous night I only slept for 4 plus hrs(its not enough for me this piggy loh) as Lynn called me and we chat about Chye Hock loh, haha...

Nevermind, after we came back from Ubin was already 3 plus in the noon. Decided to go home first before going out to town as we were all so smelly and sticky. So by the time we reached town was already 7pm, was with Darren first so we went for our routine billiard before YongHsing, Summer, Ruibin, Cheeheng, Junquan and celestal meet up with us.

After that, we went to have our dinner at Scotts food court. Summer left us loh for Chinablack... Buai steady wan leh she, haha.. we wanted to go Chinablack also but Ruibin says she wear lock-kok so never go, postpone it to next week. After dinner went for a game of billiard again and met up with Bapuk Tay, we played for just one game then left le. Next we proceeded over to Lips at Cine to chill out and by the time we reached is already 11, have about 2 hrs only.

Sat there all the way till it closed at 1, we ordered drinks and talk alot. We talked about good and bad things, talk about others and alot alot. The last thing we talked about was about ghosts and I was like "What the fuck?" I still have to walk through a park when I go home loh.... Chicken!!

Then I remembered my block is having a funeral, what if later I'm in the lift and the person standing beside me is the one who is supposed to be in the coffin? Waliao... So I decided to take a cab home and then climb the stairs up all the way to my 9th storey. Then at this moment Ruibin was like saying "take stairs no good, later halfway through you see an old lady dress in black from head to toe, squatting down at one corner ans she's staring at you but with no eyeballs!"

What the FUCK manz???? But in the end still decided to take the stairs up although I'm abit scared la. I admit I hams can? Haha..... Anyway reached home le and saw my mum still up waiting for me and asking me why am I home so late which she normally won't. Maybe she's just worried about me cuz 2 days ago I'm still down with fever and yesterday I was like whole day in Pulau Ubin, came home bathe le then go out to town again till so late. Kinda feel bad, kinda feel neglected her love and concern for me.

Now is already 1.20pm, meetin Dar and Igni at 2.30 @ my house reservoir that bus stop. Going to Beach Rd first then to town, most prob will be watching Troy at 7. Then that Tay somemore go out with HL first, idiot! Haha...

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Samuel || 4:22 AM

Friday, May 14, 2004

Fever le la.... Didn't go school today for the Viet training cause I was down with fever when I woke up this morning at 7.45am. Guess this fever could be linked to the jabs I took yesterday cause the nurse at the clinic gave us fever and malaria pills.

Then went back to sleep again after taking 2 tablets of the fever medicine. Slept all the way till 11.30am then I woke up, don't know why I kept on having migraines these few days, think I sould go consult a doctor. Haha, what if there's a tumor in my head? Then prepare for funeral le loh, hehe...

My right arm was in pain the whole night and this morning. The pain is kinda like muscle cramps, the kind of pain you would experience after a work-out. Maybe its because of yesterday, went to billiard after the jabs instead of resting our hands. Haha.. wonder how's Darren's hand, rot already I guess. I'm now listening to Hai Kuo Tian Kong by Beyond, a very nice cantonese song, very meaningful.

My mum is now beside me and she asked how do I feel cause I couldn't finish the porridge she bought for me. She thought I still have some "xin shi". Haha... Then she said, I have a piece of advice for you "No matter what, girls are everywhere, dont't just because of a girl and you starve yourself or lack of sleep or whatever" Quite true also.

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Samuel || 3:54 AM

Thursday, May 13, 2004

Jab Jab Day!!! Back home at around 7pm. Now listening to Let Me Die by Nicholas Tse, and at the same time chatting with Daphne. She's asking me alot about Dawn and I told her everything.

Anyway, didn't do much today when we were at school for the Vietnam training. Had a 2hr long lunch break so we went to Holland Village for lunch. Had Katong Laska and I think there's something wrong with the gravy cause it stirred my STOMACH! I was quite quiet at Holland V that Laska restaurant cause while reading the papers, I suddenly thought of the Haagen Daz over there which I went with Dawn a few weeks ago. I dunno why but I just suddenly thought of it and I think that Holland V is quite a romantic place, haha... I'm going crazy I think.

After that, went back to school and then to Dover Clinic to have our jabs. I had 3 jabs loh, 2 on my right hand and 1 on my left. Its not pain but its very numb, and I just realised something today, I found out that Darren is afraid of jabs. Haha, its like I'm brothers with him for almost 6 yrs but just today then I found out that he's afraid of injections, damn afraid.

After the jab, guess where Darren and I went? Bukit Timah billiard loh... haha, its a routine already, cannot escape le. Then while walking towards the Ngee Ann Petrol Kiosk bus-stop, we saw Fiona and her friend(Dawn's friend) at the cross-junction. We didn't say hello or hi at all cause they were busy but I guess they saw me and recognise me.

Nicholas Tse
» Let Me Die

Are we at war tonight
Will there be angels whispering to midnight
Don't wake when lightning strikes
My heart for you is true
Let no one take that from you
Time is running tight
Can't change from wrong to right
So I'll close my eyes and dream a little
Just like how we used to be baby
Its time to say farewell now
No need to cry of feelings
Oh it's alright
I'll end the end of lies
Heaven grant me one last wish I beg you
Let me say these words before I go
I will love you till the end of time
Every breath of mine
I'll hold you by my side
But I'll rest in peace
My sweetheart would you
Let me die in your arms with you
Only you can stop the rain tonight
Only you can change my world from black to white
So I'll close my eyes and dream a little more
Are we at war tonight
Will there be angels whispering to midnight
Don't wake when lightning strikes
Heaven grant me one last wish I beg you
Let me say these words before I go
I will love you till the end of time
Every breath of mine
I'll hold you by my side
But I'll rest in peace
My sweetheart would you
Let me die in your arms with you
Only you can stop the rain tonight
Only you can get me straight to fight
Till the sky is burning
It's the end of time
Look ahead tomorrow
Long and winding road
Keep the faith of mine
Don't let it go
You're the only reason
That I'm growing cold
What would I do
Without you
I will love you till the end of time
Every breath of mine
I'll hold you by my side
But I'll rest in peace
My sweetheart would you
Let me die in your arms with you
Only you can stop the rain tonight
Only you can make my world so bright
Life no longer ends here with you in my heart
In my heart...

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Samuel || 12:13 PM

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

To hell with Heartbreakers!!! Had a good chat with Jing Jie 2 nights ago on Sunday night. We chat about alot of things even though we chat for maybe less than an hour. She told me that alot about Edwin and I told her alot about Dawn, maybe almost everything and we were like consoling each other, haha. The she said something, "To hell with Heartbreakers." Quite true huh....

Yesterday, went to school for the viet team training. At first it was damn boring but after lunch was more fun but at around 3 plus all was already kinda exhausted and tired. Nothing much to do there except for knowing new friends, getting along with them and playing some games with them. Its damn boring, I kinda regretted going to Vietnam. Why aren't I staying in Singapore to work and at the same time I'm able to earn some money?
The whole meeting ends everyday at around 5, so I took train home yesterday instead of bus cuz it reminds me of alot of things.

Then on the way home, Ruibin, Darren, Yong Hsing and I were so chatty all along. We started to talk about girls' attitude and the stupid horoscope thing which I don't quite believe for couples. Ruibin was then telling me that maybe I treated Dawn too good, she said that guys shouldn't treat their girlfriends too good. Then whats the point of asking her to be your girlfriend? Shouldn't your girlfriend be treated with extra care to be able to differentiate between how you treat your friends and how you treat your girlfriend? She also told me alot of things about Saggitarius(Dawn's horoscopic sign), and what she said was quite accurate. She said that the mood of a saggitarius is very unpredictable. They can be happy at one time and sad the very next moment. Anyway I asked her to bring the horoscope book today so that there's thing for me to do instead of just playing games.

Then last night, was chatting on the phone with Samantha, my Sam mei, haha. She too told me about James and she's still unable to forget him. We decided to go out for a movie maybe before I fly off to Vietnam. So we were thinking, what if we saw Dawn or James outside? What are we gonna do? Samantha ask me to hold her hand and act as if we were couple, alittle childish right? I think we should just remain normal and say Hi and Bye ba, alittle sad right?? Haha...

Today I went to school as usual from 9-5 and we did nothing much except for the thinking part of what we need at Vietnam. We said out our Life Journey in the afternoon so as to let the others know us better. Life Journey? Nothing about me is interesting except going to town, play billiard, see girls and let girls see ma. Actually my Life Journey was very simple, as I didn't accomplished much stuff during my 19 yrs of living. But Darren and company made it hard for me, cuz we were suppose to draw out what we did during our life and I drew a picture of a Sun with a sad face at the top(It represents Dawn).

So the whole company were asking me what does that Sun means even though they already got the meaning. Bad right? So no choice just say that I just broke off with my gf and all that to the Viet team loh. Haha, now the Viet team knows that I'm sad, should be able to earn some sympathy from them loh, hahaha...... Sianz, tomorrow 9-5 again. Must go for medical check-up and jabs too. Haiz.... ;)

Now chatting with my Jane Jie online, I told her I got over Dawn le. But seriously I'm slowly getting over her le, I still miss her but its time I let it all go. Anyway she's attached already so I shouldn't cling onto it. I should try more relationships first before getting serious, just watched the variety show on channel 5, Daddy's Girls and there's one phrase in the show I liked which is "I shouldnt just try one car, must try more cars first to see which type suits me"

Maybe Dawn's a Lancer but the car I like is Subaru, so its totally out. We should work out better as friends I guess. If she's fated for me, she'll eventually be with me. Maybe I don't understand girls yet. I always thought that I'm so great that I understand what a girl needs and what she wants. But I'm actually an idiot when it comes to relationships and understanding a girl's needs.

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Samuel || 12:07 PM

Monday, May 10, 2004

Mother's Day! Its Mother's day today. Went out with my family for a simple lunch without my elder brother cuz he gotta work. So sad cuz we had our lunch at YU JIA ZHUANG and it was fabulous.

My mum asked me a question today over lunchtime, she asked "Boy ar, why are u so blur these few days?" I was stunned for a moment, I dunno why.. Maybe I'm blur ba, I replied her by telling her everything bout Dawn.

Then she gave me her point of view, she said that Dawn must be a very good girl if not I won't be so crazy in love with her which is quite true. She added by saying that maybe we two really couldn't get along, and she told me that we handled this relationship well as we ended it early so that it won't hurt us so much.

Other than that, she also said that Dawn did think on my part when she wanted to break-up, cuz she chose to tell me about the break-up only after my exams which is good as it didnt affect much of my mood during exams.

So I started to think on Dawn's part, I'm afraid that this relationship will affect her exams. If it really does, I'll be very sorry. After lunch, went to walk around at Suntec, Bugis and Ikea. At Suntec, my mind keep on turning back to the time when I was with Dawn. How we walk together at Suntec, Marina and Esplanade? What did we do together? Are we happy at that time?

I remember that we had our dinner at Happy Place at Suntec that time, she had pi dan shou rou chou and i had pork chop rice. Then at Bugis, I rememeber the time Dawn and I were together before we started our relationship. Thats the place we went for our 3rd date if I'm not wrong.

If we didn't break-up at that time, Dawn and I will be heading to Sentosa tomorrow for our chalet. Anyway, all these are just imaginations that i wish there is. Its all in the past, its just that I need sometime to put down all of these. I shouldn't look back anymore. I tried but its hard.

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Samuel || 11:03 AM

Sunday, May 09, 2004

I miss her.... Just got back home and bathe, feeling quite refresh now but still having my split headache.. I'm having migraines these few days, was really painful.. Also dunno how it started but maybe its because I slept quite late at night and woke up very early in the morning.. I dunno why but it may be because I'm afraid of sleeping? I'm afraid that I will sleep alot and the days will past very fast... If I could, I would turn back the time to when I met Dawn, I'll amend all my mistakes and understand her well... But this is impossible..

I already planned where to go with Dawn today if we are still together. We'll first go and catch the show, 50 First Date, after which we'll go for dinner at Lips or anywhere. Then we'll go to esplanade and listen to the songs played there. But this is just totally a dream.
Anyway today I went to Marina first at around 3 plus. On the way there on bus 700, Meng's friend Sara boarded the bus with the boyfriend at Orchard. They were heading to PS. Sara came to talk to me and asked me where I'm going to and meeting who and all that.. I told her I'm meeting my friends and she replied "Dawn ar?" I said we no more already... She was laughing away and saying so fast? At that time I wanted to scold her but I just silently look away and glance out of the window....

After that I reached marina and we were walking around with Xiurong, Jiaqing, Jiawei, Darren, and Jiahao came to meet us for dinner. Soon after that we head towards town again to meet MISS SERENE WAI with her beloved Patrick..
I was hoping to meet Dawn again, which I almost did cause my group and I were talking at Heeren Annex the highest level. Jiahao saw Dawn coming up of the escalator, I dunno why at that point of time I suddenly felt nervous.

I think Dawn was with Yifang cause Jiahao say she's with a girl, but they disappeared. I dunno where they went, maybe because she saw Jiahao and thought I'll be there too so she just left..
At around 8 plus we had nothing to do so went for our usual thing again, BILLIARD.. Jiawei was on top form and thrash us for the first 2 games. We played till around 10 and left cuppage, I wanted to go Cine or Heeren to see if Dawn was there but luckily I didn't. Cause when I was on 190 at Wisma there, Serena called me and she told me she saw Dawn at mac at Lido, I wanted to go and find her but she said Dawn already left..

Maybe I think too much? Maybe she's really not meant for me? Maybe we couldn't even get along well? All these questions keep on asking me these few days...

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SaM; DaIrY oFHiMselF______________________
Samuel || 2:15 PM

Saturday, May 08, 2004

I vent my anger, thanks Tay!!! Yesterday night I really went to bukit timah and vent all my anger and sadness away on pool... Wanna thank Jiahao alot, really my bro cause even though he's having his maths paper the next day, he asked me out at 6pm for snooker.. He even wanted to treat me eat, really wanna thank him alot...

Then today, went to school in the afternoon at 3 to hand in the ITP form. After that waited in club from 4 plus till 5 plus for MR DARREN TAN, that busy BE president..
We went to orchard later in the evening and we played billiard, he let me thrash him that day cause he knows that I'm sad. We played from 6 till bout 7 plus before going to Wisma to meet up with Jane.

I was walking aimlessly in orchard with Darren as I was hoping to bump into Dawn, but really, if I see her I will also be at a lost of words cause the whole situation will be awkward.. I dunno why but I just feel like seeing her, how's her life, and is she happier without me? Darren on the other hand also wanting to meet up with Lynn so badly, finally he really saw Lynn. He too was so lost for words that he just said hi to her and bye..

After that, we went for billiard again.. Life sucks right? Playing billiard whole night.. But I dunno why, I really miss her tonight. Maybe because before our break-up I already start to plan how am I going to spend the day with her and all sorts of crazy stuff..

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SaM; DaIrY oFHiMselF______________________
Samuel || 2:04 PM

Thursday, May 06, 2004

D-Day.... We broke up!!! I woke up at 12.30pm. The first thing I did was to msg her "Good morning Darling.."
After which I went to wash up and had my lunch. Halfway through, I noticed that there's a small cockroach in the soup, DARN was I angry. So I pack it up and threw it away, normally I would still be hungry and will be finding food away. But I went to my comp instead as dear says she had something for me, wanted to find out what she had for me badly. Reading through her mail doesn't make me sad at first cause I thought she was joking but at the end of the mail, I found out what she say was from the bottom of her heart. It happened so quickly as she was still the same lovely girl the past 2 days. Does her feelings fade away so quickly??

I was very stunned and shocked. Seriously, if I have a weak heart, I'll be in the ICU at SGH already. So I msg her "Ok, I understand. All the best for ya last exam and u take good care of urself k??" I had a dental appointment today so bo bian I have to go with my mum. If not I would rather stay at home and lie on my bed the whole day. My mum went to Orchard like she never did before and ask me what I wanna eat almost every 15mins. I got so fed up that I told her I'm not at the very least hungry at all!!!! I'm sorry mum.. Reach home at about 6pm and I lock myself in the room till 10pm, didn't eat much just about half pack of rice.

I msg Dawn again at 10 pm asking ?U now at home? Are u free now? Can I call u?? But she replied saying she's still outside so I said nvm, we can talk again some other time. Instead, I called Xiurong and Serene. Want to thank them so much cause even though they are having test the next day, they still spent their precious time consoling me, talking to me.

I went to bed at 12 that night but I couldn't slp so in the end still log onto the net at 1am and saw Dawn. Chatted with her and ask her afew questions. She said she had no comments and what she wanted to say she had already said. The last thing she told me was that? Maybe you're not the right guy for me.?After which I log off from the net as I don't wish to continue. I don't know what happened, how and why it happened I don't wish to know. I just want my dear back, the same old Dawn that I used to know...

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SaM; DaIrY oFHiMselF______________________
Samuel || 5:00 PM

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

My last paper..... Dear just had her second paper finished before her last paper on the 7th May. So she went Orchard with Yifang and gang (I guess). I finished my last paper on Hydraulics at 4 plus, wanted to go and meet dear but she never answer my phone cause she told me its gonna be a flat batt soon.

So instead, I went to ginza with my poly friends for a game of billiard. I waited for dear to reach home at 2am, I don't mind at all cause she's different from my other friends. She msg me and told me she reach home already, going to bathe soon so I thought she's gonna call me.
Thus, I waited and waited till about 3am before I msg her ?U forgot u got a darling to call huh?? She didn't reply and I was alittle tired already so I msg her at 3.30am telling her? I'm going to bed le, u slp earlier too k? Good night.? I'm abit angry but I can't be so male chauvinistic right? I received a msg from dear the next morning which she sent at 4.13am the last night saying "hmmm... Check ya mail?I sent something? Good night : )"

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Samuel || 12:30 AM

Saturday, May 01, 2004

One Month le.... Today is the one month anniversary with my darling, Dawn. I went for soccer in the morning at SP as she is still sleeping. At 3pm, went to Jurong Point to collect the bouquet of flowers I bought for her. After that, I took a cab down to her house.

The taxi-driver was talking non stop to me, about what I dunno as I just heard a lot of vulgarities from him. I was not listening as I was looking forward to meet my dear cause I miss her badly. When I reach, dear says I cant go up to her house as her mum will be back any moment so I loitered around her HDB block for about 15mins before I went up to her flat, place the bouquet of white lily at her doorway before leaving, waiting for her downstairs.

Dear says she is happy and touch, hearing these words, I'm very happy although its just a hp msg. Waited for her downstairs for about an hour and a half but I don't mind even though I'm falling asleep away. After that we went to West Mall mac and she studied, although I was doing nothing throughout the 4 hours at mac but I'm happy and contented watching my dear studying cause she just look so cute. We went home at 10pm, dear says her dad will be coming to fetch her so she accompanied me to the bus-stop and waited for me to leave first.

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SaM; DaIrY oFHiMselF______________________
Samuel || 1:30 PM

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